East Midlands couples say ‘What’ more often than ‘I love you’
•New research reveals that 3% of people in the East Midlands admit they’ve argued with their partner due to not hearing them properly, leading to arguments and frustration. •After a week of public bickering, Michael and Hilary Whitehall reveal the impact hearing loss has had on their marriage in a Public Service Announcement video with Specsavers’ hearing experts
‘WHAT?’ is now a more common phrase than ‘I love you’ among couples 55+, according to new research.
3% of people in the East Midlands in a relationship admit they’ve argued with their partner because they couldn’t hear each other properly, reveals a survey from Specsavers. This results in people feeling ‘frustrated’ (44%), ‘ignored’ (28%) and even ‘unloved’ (5%).
Undiagnosed hearing loss could therefore be the culprit of these relationship bickers. To raise awareness of the issue, the Whitehalls have partnered with Specsavers to cheekily cause drama by appearing to argue in a series of public stunts that show how Michael’s hearing difficulties affect their daily lives.
After wide-spread comment and speculation, the couple have since revealed in a hilarious new Public Service Announcement video that Michael’s undetected hearing loss was the source of many of these bickers.
Michael has now been fitted with new hearing devices and the pair are encouraging other couples in similar situations to take action to stay connected.
Michael Whitehall says: ‘I’ve always blamed our usual bickers on Hilary’s mumbling. After a little persuasion, I had a hearing check at Specsavers and it turns out I have a little bit of hearing loss. Who knew?
‘The most romantic thing you can do … is booking a hearing check. Safe to say, missing half the conversation isn’t ideal in a marriage. Now I’ve been fitted with hearing devices I’ve realised how much I was missing before – and the issues my hearing was causing.’
Hilary Whitehall comments: ‘For a long time I thought Michael was just ignoring me or not getting my jokes. Unsurprisingly, or at least not to me, Michael’s hearing check identified a little hearing loss. But now we know that’s what’s going on and he’s got a hearing device, we’re bickering less and laughing more.’
The Whitehalls aren’t alone in their hearing struggles. In the East Midlands, 21% admit they argue every week due to not quite hearing one another. Misunderstandings between couples range from simply getting the wrong end of the stick in a conversation (33%) to actually offending their partner (16%).
This has resulted in 18% walking away from the conversation and 11% have even stopped talking to their other half.
When asked what might help ease these issues, one in five cited a hearing check as a potential fix – and, in fact, at least one member of 24% of couples has suggested the other book an appointment.
Relationship expert, Sarah Louise Ryan, comments: ‘Miscommunication in relationships is one of the most common issues I hear about in my couples’ practice. For some, it’s that they’re having trouble expressing themselves, or that they don’t have the tools to resolve a difference of opinion, but in many cases, it’s a result of couples not hearing each other correctly. This can cause marital tension and frustration. So, if this sounds familiar in your relationship, don’t put off seeking expert help.
Specsavers hearing expert, Joanne Harris, at Nuneaton, says: ‘18 million adults in the UK have hearing loss [1] and many don’t realise that they are missing parts of the conversation. Since it develops gradually, people often wait up to ten years before seeking help. But when hearing loss starts to affect relationships, it’s time to act. A hearing check can help couples reconnect and truly hear each other again.’
For some, not being quite heard by their partner becomes a daily issue, with 2% in the East Midlands saying they’re misunderstood by their partner at least once a day.
Dr Zoe Williams, GP, adds: ‘Hearing loss doesn’t just affect your ears, it affects your relationships, confidence, and overall wellbeing. It’s important not to ignore ear health – if you’re having challenges hearing properly, there are steps you can take to get back on the same page.’
To watch the Whitehall’s PSA please visit the following link: specsavers.co.uk/hearing/relationships
If you or your partner aren’t quite hearing each other clearly or you’re not getting the whole conversation, book a free hearing check with a Specsavers hearing expert. It might just solve more than you think.
[1] Akeroyd MA and Munro KJ (2024) Population estimates of the number of adults in the United Kingdom with a hearing loss updated using 2021 and 2022 census data. bioRxiv. DOI: 10.1101/2024.01.26.24301819