Children's 7 biggest fears around transitioning to secondary school - as offers day nears

• This year’s primary school leavers will soon have a better idea of which secondary school they will start at in autumn
• While it’s an exciting time, many young people also feel worried
• Luckily, there are things parents can do to help - from answering their questions to practicing scenarios with them

Starting secondary school is like entering a whole new world - and for many young people it’s an exciting time.

But it can also be nerve-wracking. Secondary schools are typically much bigger, and pupils usually won’t stay put in the same classroom, with the same teacher all day. Instead, they’ll have different classes to keep track of, as well as the stresses of making new friends, harder school and homework, and eventually preparing for secondary school exams.

Next week is national secondary school offers day, when primary school leavers across England will find out which local secondary school will offer them a place come September - when the new school year begins. From Monday, (March 3) they’ll have a better idea of what their secondary school life might look like, as they enter the transition period.

The UK’s only newspaper specifically for young people - First News - recently worked with mental health charity and counselling service Childline, and rapper, poet, author and teacher Christian Foley, to create a guide for parents wanting to ease this transition for young people who are feeling a little more anxious.

Here’s what they said children were often worried about - and how you as a parent or carer can help answer their big questions:

What children starting secondary school worry about

1. Having new teachers

Ms Foley said that it is worth reminding children that teachers in secondary school are human as well - just like their primary school teachers were.

“The main difference is that rather than getting to know one class teacher a lot, you get to know a lot of class teachers, but not quite as well,” she continued. “Secondary teachers expect you to do your best, and they want what is best for you, and that can mean reminding you of the rules.”

2. Going to a different school from their friends and losing contact with them

A young person’s close friends may end up going to other secondary schools, and there could naturally be some fear about losing touch. It is worth reminding children that this is a normal part of life, but for important friends, they can always find ways to spend time together outside of school.

Ms Foley said her own mother told her, “the friendships that are meant to last, will last”. She continued: “Perhaps you may lose touch with some of your class, that’s completely natural, but anyone that you want to stay close to, you’ll find a way. Life will unfold as it is meant to, so try not to stress about it.”

3. Not being able to make new friends

If they’re starting a new school and don’t know anyone, children might feel anxious or scared that people won’t like them, Childline told First News. But there are things they can do to make finding new friends easier - which you can work on with your child at home.

These include using positive body language, like smiling, looking people in the eyes, and speaking confidently. They also recommended encouraging children to practice going up to someone new. “The more they try, the easier it can be.”

But they also said you should remind your child that sometimes, making friends can take time. If they’re worried about break or lunch times, you can encourage them to use the library or ICT rooms until they feel more confident.

4. Exams and homework being hard

Ms Foley said there’s no avoiding it - young people are going to have to do some homework.

But you can remind them that teachers don’t typically want to assign so much homework that it stresses them out.

“It’s meant to be a supplement to your classroom learning. Like a side plate with your main course, to make sure you get enough educational nutrition. Treat homework like broccoli, even if you don’t like the taste. Trust me, you’ll be better off having it,” she said.

Homework and even tests will typically be on things they have covered in class, so as long as they pay attention, actually do their homework, and revise when they know a test is coming up, they should know they will probably be okay.

5. Finding their way around a bigger school

Secondary schools tend to be bigger in every way, from the amount of fellow pupils to sheer physical size. It’s only natural for children to worry about getting lost or being late for class.

Ms Foley said parents should remind their child that there’s no need to panic, because everyone else is in the same situation. “Never be afraid to ask for help or directions.”

She said that making their way around will get easier by the day, and eventually it’ll just be second nature. “Just say ‘I’m sorry I’m late’ during the first term and [teachers] won’t mind, but if you’re still doing it in Year 13, you’re probably getting lost on purpose.”

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6. New rules to follow

Secondary schools sometimes have a reputation for being more strict, which can be worrying for young people - especially those sensitive to getting in trouble. Ms Foley said that these new rules essentially boil down to three things; homework, equipment, punctuality.

You can explain what this will mean to your child, to help them feel prepared. “You’ve got to do your assignments, bring the right stuff to class and turn up on time. Other rules like don’t mess around or treat someone else unkindly – they are punished just like they were in primary – except now it’s a bit more serious. We expect more from you as you grow up, because your thinking develops too.”

7. Being bullied

Finally, many young people are concerned about bullying at secondary school. Childline advised parents make sure their child knows to talk to someone trusted (like you or a friendly teacher) or reach out for help if they need to.

“If they had a great first day or if they found it difficult, it can help to talk about it. Saying what they found hard can help them to think of ways to cope and feel better.” Childline also has counsellors available to lend extra support to young people if they need it. They be contacted over the phone on 0800 1111 or online here.

This article is produced in partnership with First News, an award-winning newspaper for UK children read by 2.2 million each week. To find out more about getting First News at home or in your child’s school, or even to browse its other online offerings for young people, you can visit its website here.