Awfully Funny: As awful as dementia is, at times it can be awfully funny

Adam Gleeson cared for his mum when she had dementia, and as well as the many heartbreaking moments there were also several humorous moments. And after his mum died a friend of his suggested he write a book about the funny things that often occur whilst looking after someone with dementia.

At first Adam was slightly reluctant to do it as he thought that it might be a bit ‘cruel’ to laugh about such things. But as his friend said, you’re not laughing at the person- be it your mum, dad, husband or wife who is suffering from it - you’re laughing at what it is they’ve done. And chances are that the person who has done ‘the daft thing’ would probably laugh themselves if they knew they’d done it.

Adam’s mum would have definitely laughed if she’d have known that some of the things she was doing were so stupid! And so with that in mind Adam decided to do it and he got people to send him their stories to put alongside his own, and the stories are guaranteed to bring a smile to the face of anyone who has ever had a loved one suffer from dementia. And not only will they bring a smile to your face they’ll have you holding your sides laughing!

One of those who contributed stories sums dementia up when he describes it as a thief that comes in the night and steals memories and thoughts from the mind, and it keeps coming back every night stealing more and more memories and thoughts until they’ve all gone. And then once the thief has left and taken all of the person’s memories with them a demon starts coming and starts planting bad and unpleasant thoughts in their mind. The bad thoughts then start to take over and gradually wear the person’s brain down until it eventually stops working.

It also wears the person’s loved one’s down too. And it’s equally bad for them watching it happen. It can be worse in fact. Because a loved one can see the thief and the demon at work but there’s absolutely nothing they can do to stop them. All they can do is watch. And suffer. Just like their mum, dad, husband or wife is suffering.

As Adam says, “I’ve seen and done things that no son should have to see or do for their mum. And I won’t be the only one. There'll be thousands of other sons - and daughters - who have to do things for their mum’s and dad’s that they really shouldn’t have to. But we do those things because we don’t forget the things that our mum’s and dad’s did for us. I’ve seen it all with my mum, from the hilarious and the comical to the tragic, the despairing and the pitiful. I even thought about killing my mum to put her out of her misery. So if a loved one of yours suffers from dementia, when funny and humorous moments come along make the most of them, because for every funny and humorous moment there'll be a thousand awful ones.”

Adam's book is heartrending, tear-jerking and extremely moving. But, as awful as dementia is, as the stories in it show, at times it can be awfully funny.