Mum with pram using disabled toilet ‘hurried’ wheelchair user out - sparking huge online debate

A disabled mother has sparked over 1000 responses to her ‘Am I being unreasonable’ query, when she urged an aquarium to put a lock on the disabled users toilet.

The woman, who states she was out at the aquarium to celebrate her second eldest child’s birthday, had already waited outside the only disabled loo for the parent who was occupying it with her two children.

When she got into the toilet, she was hurried by someone else who needed access and was “rattling” the door.

‘I have no choice’

Upon leaving the toilet she opened the door to find the person hurrying her was a woman with a child in a pram.

She asked the community on Mumsnet ‘Am I being unreasonable (AIBU)’ for being annoyed that she had been forced to wait to use the loo by one able-bodied woman, only to be interrupted in the loo by another able-bodied person.

The original poster added that she had since asked the aquarium to fix a radar lock onto the toilet door, as it was specifically for disabled people and not an accessible toilet with baby changing facilities.

The woman wrote: "As I am in a wheelchair, I have no choice in which bathroom I can use, I had to use the disabled toilet.

"I had to wait until a mother and a couple of younger kids came out of the disabled toilet which surprised me. As it looked unlikely that any of the younger kids would need nappies.

"Then I went in. This was a dedicated disabled (not accessible) toilet with no baby change facilities. I do understand that the first mother might have an invisible disability, as might her children."

But, as the disabled mum was using the toilet, she was interrupted several times by someone rattling the handle, hurrying her up.

"I kept calling out that the toilet was occupied, which was frustrating. When I left an impatient mother with a pram was waiting to go in.

"I told her that there were no nappy changing facilities in that toilet, assuming she wanted to change the baby. But she snapped at me that she was a mother and had to use this toilet while gesturing to the pram.

"I felt that this second mother was just entitled and rude. Having a pram doesn’t entitle you to use a disabled toilet."

‘Your anger is misplaced’

Other members of Mumsnet, which is generally made up of other parents and carers, offered their take on the situation.

Many were quick to defend her fury, with one commenting: “You’re absolutely right - when my DC were too little to leave outside I brought them into the cubicle. It’s crowded and annoying, but loads better than being disabled with no choice.”

However, the original poster had also suggested women with prams should use the ladies toilet but leave the cubicle door open and the pram positioned in the entrance to the cubicle if their child is too young to be left unattended.

This point resulted in some feeling the problem was a lack of family-friendly loos, with one post reading: “I have been that mother left with no choice but to pee with the door open because there are no toilet stalls in the women’s loos big enough to take a pram. It is horrid, and shows how little women, especially mothers, are considered in design.

“It must be frustrating for her, but I think your anger is misplaced when directed at that poor mum.”

Another questioned how anyone could determine who is and is not disabled by simply looking at them.

“YABVU [You are being very unreasonable]. As you’ve said you have no idea if either of those women had a hidden disability, its not your job to question people on their motives for using a certain toilet,” replied another.

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