Valentine's Day jokes: 41 of the best funny jokes for adults and kids' cards - one liners and silly puns

Ah, Valentine's Day, the cultural equivalent of a badly cooked heart-shaped pancake - seemingly delightful but often leaving a bitter aftertaste.

Whether you're revelling in the annual celebration of love, or embarking on a desperate mission for last-minute gestures - that forgotten card is going to need a witty joke to salvage it - here are the best cheesy lines, heart-warming chuckles and cringe-worthy puns.

Like a bouquet of comedic flowers with a few thorns; Because nothing says "I love you" like a good laugh.

Here are 41 of the best (and worst) Valentine's Day jokes to keep you chuckling whatever your situation:

• What did one light bulb say to the other light bulb on Valentine’s Day? "I love you watts!"
• What did the toast say to the butter on Valentine’s Day? "You’re my butter half!"
• What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse? “I’ve got a crutch on you!”
• What did the Valentine’s Day card say to the stamp? "Stick with me and you’ll go places!"
• What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts!
• What’s the perfect thing to say to a coffee lover on Valentine’s Day? "Words cannot espresso what you mean to me."
• What did one rabbit say to the other on Valentine’s Day? "Some bunny loves you!"
• Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day? Because they’re scent-imental!
• What did one watermelon say to the other on Valentine’s Day? "You’re one in a melon!"
• Did Adam and Eve ever have a date? No, they had an apple!
• What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? "I’m sweet on you!"
• What did one boiled sweet say to the other? "It’s Valentine’s Day and we’re mint for each other."
• What do you call a very small valentine? A valentiny!
• Why do melons have to get married in churches? Because they cantaloupe!
• What’s the best part about Valentines Day? The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale.
• What did one fungus say to the other on Valentine’s Day? "There’s so mushroom in my heart for you!"
• What do you call a ghost’s true love? His ghoul-friend.
• What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has a date on Valentine’s day!
• How did the phone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.
• Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank? It was a case of guppy love.
• What do farmers give their wives on Valentine’s Day? Hogs and kisses!
• What did one pickle say to the other? "You mean a great dill to me."
• What did one magnet say to the other on Valentine’s Day? I find you very attractive!
• What did one oar say to the other? "Can I interest you in a little row-mance?"
• Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef? They’ll dessert you.
• Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? She didn’t suit his taste!
• What do pigs give on February 14? Valen-swines!
• What did the chef give their Valentine? A hug and a quiche!
• What did the bat say to their Valentine? "You’re fun to hang around with."
• What did the flame say to his friends after he fell in love? "I found the perfect match!"
• Did you hear about the bed bugs who fell in love? They’re getting married in the spring!
• What did the one sheep say to the other? "I love ewe!"
• What did one volcano say to the other? “I lava you!”
• What did one bee say to the other? "I love bee-ing with you, honey!"
• What did the painter say to her boyfriend? "I love you with all my art!"
• What’s the best Valentine’s Day dinner?A hearty one.
• How do you put a flower in the friend zone? You tell it, "You’re my best bud."
• What did the snail say on Valentine's Day when his call went to voicemail? "I just crawled to say I love you."
• What did the soil say to express its feelings for the rock? "I’d settle for you."
• When should you ask someone out on a coffee date? When you like them a latte.
• Where do you find love in a grocery store? Aisle B… there for you.