Has Halloween come early? Tips for handling doom and gloom

And we can’t escape the unrest that we’re seeing in so many places around the world, the latest being the atrocities in Israel and Gaza. There isn’t a witch in sight, but with those emotional dark clouds building it’s become a horror movie playing out in real life.

But wait.

Is there is a danger that the events happening in our world today will also take their toll on our inner world, affecting us mentally and emotionally? There absolutely is. And luckily that, we can do something about. So, if you want to lift away those dark clouds and feelings of hopelessness - here are a few simple steps you can take to help yourself.

Managing the ‘mental monsters’

 Right now, there is no shortage of negativity globally and, just how much of that comes into your head, will have a bearing on how you feel. Couple that with whatever is going on in your life – personally and professionally and you could easily have a head full of ‘mental monsters’,  by that I mean thoughts that cause you concern, make you feel bad or negative. It can be an anxiousness you can’t seem to shake off. Worse still, if they’re left to swirl around our heads all day, before you know it you can’t concentrate, you feel restless, your mood is low and by the end of the day you struggle to see what you’ve achieved. Sound familiar? Those mental monsters have won the battle in your head.

 But hold on, why should they win? It’s your head after all – you decide what you allow to stay in your head and influence your day. There is a real discipline to this and, at times like this it isn’t easy, but the more aware you are of your thoughts, the more you can practise filtering them , challenging or ignoring them.

 Ask yourself: Is this thought helping me? Or Can I do anything about it? If the answer is ‘no’ to both, ditch them and switch your focus firmly onto whatever you are doing in that moment. Move on.

Being in control – of yourself

Sometimes, we can spend hours – days even - worrying about things we think might happen, but then they don’t. It’s that dreaded ‘What if….?’ place we sink into, and it can drive us nuts. We can save ourselves from falling into this pit by being aware of and questioning the validity of our thoughts. Ask yourself: How likely is this (insert concern here) to happen?

If you truly believe that it (whatever ‘it’ is) could happen, then write down what steps you can take, when you can do them and who you can call on to help you along the way. Being honest, the things we worry about are often not in our control, and the thoughts and fears we have about them just wear us down. So, if it isn’t, change the subject ,and switch your focus onto something else. That banish the blues and boost your mood.

Be your own gatekeeper

You might want to – have to – know what’s going on in the world every day, but you can still limit how much of it you read and watch. And you can put a restriction on how late in the evening you do that. The last news alerts, tik tok videos, or bits of online content you watch before you go to bed, are likely to affect your sleep and be on your mind when you wake up.

That’s not good news, if it’s another piece of bad or disturbing viewing, is it?

But it’s not just about what we watch – it’s also about who we surround ourselves with, and who we listen to. Have you ever worked with someone who has a knack of putting you in a bad mood? Or someone who is good at (intentionally or not) belittling you? What about that person who puts on you, and takes advantage of your good nature?

Yes, friends, colleagues, family - beware of all of them. You might not be able to avoid them totally (although, worth considering?) but you can get brutal with your time, and how much of it you spend with the people in your life. It’s your life you’re living, live it your way.

Change perspective

It would be so much easier if we could solve the problems in the world (and in our own lives), in an instant, but we can’t.  Sadly, we only need to spend a few minutes listening to the news reports (any day of the week) to realise that we might well be the lucky ones. Yes, we still have our problems, worries and stuff going on, but we also have plenty to be grateful for. That might be our health, a roof over our heads, safety, a job, family, and friends or even a sense of gratitude that we live where we do. What we have could be plenty compared to millions of others.

Even if we don’t feel positive, we can always feel optimistic that what lies ahead of us is something better. Changing our perspective on our lives can help us to see what we can’t see, and what we probably take for granted.

Talk about it 

OK, some of these things are easy enough to do, but some will take determination and persistence. You know you better than anyone, and if you really want to lift yourself up from the doom and gloom, then stick at it and you’re on your way to feeling a whole lot better.

Equally, I’m not pretending that we’ll all be able to ‘just get on with it’ because occasionally, we need someone by our side to give us that pick- me- up when we’re struggling. You might have that someone already in your life.  If you do, there’s nothing better than chewing the fat, and getting the things that are bothering you off your chest.

And if you don’t, there will be someone you can call on (GP, online support, external help). Whoever it is, don’t hold back from it. Even with real life nightmares, talking it out, works.