Father diagnosed with terminal cancer wrote daughter a heartbreaking note to read after his death
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A father who was diagnosed with incurable bowel cancer spent his final days secretly writing letters to his four children to read after his death. When children’s nurse, Sophie Randell, 28, opened her note, she discovered her dad, Mike Randell, had given her boyfriend his blessing to propose after he’d passed away.
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Hide AdExactly two years since Mike died and Sophie received her letter, Ash Humphrey got down on one knee to officially ask for her hand in marriage at the Trevi Fountain in Rome. But before sitting down to plan the wedding Sophie, Ash, her mum, Jane and siblings, Matthew, Emily and Luke, who has Down’s syndrome, have chosen to Stand Up To Cancer in Mike’s memory – a joint fundraising campaign from Cancer Research UK and Channel 4.
Sophie said: “My dad would be really happy to know I’m engaged and it means a lot to have his blessing. He told me in his letter that even though it will be a bittersweet moment, to remember that it’s our day, to be positive and that he’d be right there with me, just not in body.
“Together, we always hoped that there would be a new treatment that might make Dad’s cancer go away so he could share moments like this, but it just didn’t happen for him. Now we’re determined to take a stand against the disease and share our story to help accelerate life-saving research and give other people the chance to live longer.
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Hide Ad“Dad was often doing a charity challenge to support other people and this was close to his heart. He’d be proud to help others diagnosed with this disease.”
Sophie and her family hope their story will inspire people to stand together by raising money to help make the next cancer breakthrough happen. They’re calling on people to flex their fundraising muscles by taking part in Stand Up To Cancer’s 100 squats a day challenge this November.
With support available online ‘every rep of the way’, participants can adapt the challenge to suit their fitness level by completing their squats anytime, anywhere – all at once or throughout the day. Alternatively, people can choose to donate, raise money in their own way, or pick from a host of fun-filled ideas with a free fundraising pack available online for inspiration and support.
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Hide AdSophie said: “My dad was always keen for people to donate towards research after his death to find out more about the disease. He had none of the traditional bowel cancer symptoms when he was diagnosed and only got checked after he struggled to get over a bout of flu.
“He just couldn’t get back to how he was before and felt really tired. He had some blood tests and scans and that highlighted some masses on his bowel and liver, so he had a biopsy to find out exactly what they were.
“With my medical knowledge and after looking for support online, we knew what was coming and I was sure he was going to be told he had advanced cancer. It was so upsetting to have it confirmed that my Dad, who was just 56 and due to retire the following day, had stage 4 bowel cancer.
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Hide Ad“We explained to my brother Luke, who has Down’s syndrome, that there was something in dad’s tummy that wasn’t supposed to be there and that he was going to have some medicine that would try to get rid of it.
“Dad was willing to try anything so he began chemotherapy which helped to shrink the tumours. He also had surgery to remove cancer from his bowel which led him to having a colostomy.
“He received more chemotherapy and further surgeries to reverse the colostomy, remove some of his diseased liver and part of his lung and in between all the treatments, dad managed to have periods of time over those three years when he could live normally and even go away on holiday.
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Hide Ad“He always held onto the hope that the cancer would go away, but towards the end of 2021 he knew the time he had left with us was limited. In the last few weeks he secretly wrote individual letters to each of us and chose a gift for us so that we always had a part of him with us.
“He decided to spend his final days at home and we all stayed there so we could be with him when the time came. He passed away with us all by his side on October 10, 2022.
“Later that day my mum explained to us that dad had written a letter for each of us and wanted us to have a gift. He gave both my sister and me a ring which we wear every day and my brothers received a watch.
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Hide Ad“It was so emotional reading the letters he gave to us and he thanked us for everything we’d done for him and said how proud he was of us and the jobs we do. He encouraged us to live life to the fullest and in my letter, he explained that Ash had asked for my hand in marriage and that he had given him permission to propose. It’s so important to me and something I really treasure.
“Losing dad has been so hard, especially on Luke. Just before he died, dad gave him a memory box including old pictures of them both, his watch and his old passport. He’s doing better now but mentions dad all the time so we talk about him to keep in our memories.
“As we reach the two-year anniversary of losing him, it’s really important to us that we show that cancer can affect anyone’s life, at any time, so we really have no choice other than to unite against it and help support the scientists to keep making new discoveries.
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Hide Ad“That’s why I’m lending my heartfelt support to this vitally important campaign. Now is the moment for everyone to Stand Up To Cancer. Every action big or small could make a difference”
Stand Up To Cancer takes developments from the lab and accelerates them into new tests and treatments that could help save the lives of more people diagnosed with the disease.
It’s helping to transform the landscape of cancer therapy. Since its launch in 2012, the campaign has raised more than £113 million, funding 73 clinical trials and research projects involving more than 13,000 cancer patients.
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Hide AdStand Up To Cancer is currently funding Professor Simon Bach’s STAR-TREC trial, which aims to improve treatment for rectal cancer. People with rectal cancer often have radical surgery called rectal removal, which can lead to life-long impacts like using a colostomy bag. Professor Bach is using radiotherapy or chemotherapy so that a big surgery can be avoided. This could lead to better survival and quality of life for people affected by rectal cancer.
Cancer Research UK spokesperson for Hampshire, Elisa Mitchell, said: “Thanks to our supporters like Sophie and her family, our researchers are working tirelessly to help more people survive or live longer with cancer. From pioneering technology using lasers and robots to improve cancer surgery to using AI to optimise radiotherapy treatment for rectal cancer and creating lollypops that could detect mouth cancer, we’re at the cutting edge of research.
“But we must go further and faster. Nearly one in two of us will get cancer in our lifetime. All of us can help beat it. That’s why we’re asking everyone to Stand Up To Cancer with us. Whether it’s choosing to donate, fundraise, or tackle the ups and downs of our squats challenge, if thousands of us make a stand we’ll speed up the progress of vital research – meaning more people live longer, better lives, free from the fear of cancer.”
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Hide AdTo take part, donate or fundraise, visit the Stand Up Toe Cancer website.
Stand Up To Cancer: Over a decade of progress - lifetimes of impact
Cancer is the number one cause of death in the UK. In the 1970s, 1 in 4 people in the UK survived cancer for 10 years or more. But today, thanks to progress in research, it’s 2 in 4.
Stand Up To Cancer aims to accelerate life-saving advances to see 3 in 4 people survive their disease for 10 years or more by 2034.
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Hide AdThanks to the generosity of the public, key achievements made possible by funding from the campaign include:
- Showing that the drug olaparib is effective against an aggressive type of prostate cancer, meaning more people can now access the drug via the NHS – improving their chance of survival.
- Creating a simple blood test that could soon be widely available to help doctors better understand and treat advanced breast cancer.
- Developing a potential new cancer treatment for the future by designing a method that could make chemotherapy kinder, delivering drugs more precisely – and with fewer side effects – via microscopic bubbles.
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