What can Love Island teach us about real love? Amana Walker on Casa Amor's life lessons

The goings-on in Casa Amor may be all for the TV cameras, but what can Love Island teach us about real love? Life coach Amana Walker shares her advice

You'll either love it, hate it…or you might not even know what I'm talking about, but ITV2’s Love Island is now in full swing on the sun-drenched island of Majorca.

The good news is that you don’t need to be under 28 to find love - it can and does hit us at any age, and often when we’re least expecting it.

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So, whether you are watching the TV shenanigans or not, in amongst the love triangles, gorgeous bodies, and search for that 'special one' - there are some life lessons for all of us.

What can we learn from Love Island? (Graphic: Kim Mogg / JPI)

Here are a few:

Love at first sight - really?

Love at first sight DOES exist, but you have to look behind the image to make sure it's real love....and not just lust. Don’t get me wrong, lust is worth having, but the sudden rush of emotion you get when you first clap eyes on that special person has a habit of fading. Beauty on the inside, which consists of things like personality, behaviour, and treatment of others, is much deeper than the physical attraction on the outside.

And, by the way - if we (that might not mean you) worked as hard on our ‘inner beauty’ as we do on our outer appearance, the world would be a much more loving place to live.

It’s a cliché, but just be you

You can pretend to be someone you're not - but you can't keep it up forever. At some point, the real you will start to show up and the person you are with is going to see that sooner or later. Don’t be afraid to be who you are (as feisty Faye, Caring Kaz and lovable Liberty have shown us). Sure, not everyone will warm to you, but at least it’s not an act.The person who is into you for the long haul, likes you anyway - the good bits and the not so good bits (we're all human, right?).

Keep a check on yourself

As we’ve seen on Love Island, our emotions can get the better of us and before you know it, we’ve said or done something we later regret.

I know, I know it’s easier said than done - but it pays to pause and think before you react.

In the spirit of the late Caroline Flack’s words: Be kind. There’s no need to be mean or launch into a jealous rage or act like an idiot, because if you do lose control, you are also likely to lose the very love you want to keep. And who gets hurt in the long run? You do.

Be aware of how you are coming across.

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You are attractive

Just because you haven't found someone yet, doesn't mean you won't. There's nothing wrong with you.

Sadly, there hasn’t (yet) been enough diversity of shapes, sizes and race amongst the female contestants, especially this year, and that’s enough to make anyone feel like an odd one out or worse, inadequate. If you do harbour any of those feelings, listen up - the hotties on Love Island are a tiny sample of the population out there, and they’re not everyone’s cup of tea either.

There is someone for everyone and that person just needs to find you.

When you value yourself and believe in yourself you radiate inner confidence...and that can be magnetic.

Everyone is a hottie to right the person.

Love is wonderful - but so is friendship

Love Island - and life - brings an opportunity, should you want it, to find love. But as we see every year on the TV programme - and this year is no exception, it's also an opportunity to be a good friend. Friendships can run deeper and last longer than love.

Liberty and Kaz will do anything for each other, and as we’ve seen with Hugo calling out Toby’s treatment of Chloe - a betrayal of friendship can cause immense friction.

Friendship, like love, needs to be worked at, nurtured, and protected. Stay loyal.

Not everyone on Love Island is being honest. It seems that some are staying with their partner but still thinking they can find someone ‘better’ (I’ll leave you to decide who that is) . How excited were the boys about Casa Amor? Too excited if you have every intention of remaining loyal to your partner.

Your behaviour - not your words - demonstrates how you really feel. Body language , particularly facial expressions, always give the game away.

Let’s see what the next few days in the Love Island villa and Casa Amor bring. There will be plenty of flirting and impressing going on, it’s human nature and both are attraction tools.

Some of the islanders will stay faithful, whilst other will try to get away with anything but. And being ‘tested’ is not about who else comes along to tempt you, it’s a test of the true measure of your feelings.

Of course, not everyone will stay together, especially when their whirlwind romance in the sun ends, and they return to reality in the UK.

So, the final lesson? Real love takes patience and hard work.

But is it worth the effort? Absolutely.

Amana Walker is a performance coach who works with a range of business leaders and sports professionals. More info at www.amanawalker.com

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