Chris Kamara 'thought about suicide' when speech apraxia cost him his Sky Sports football pundit role

Chris Kamara became a cult figure for his enthusiasm and analysis on Sky Sports’ Saturday programme, summarising live games. But he was diagnosed with speech apraxia in 2022 after his words became slurred, and concerned viewers had noticed.

Now 65, the former footballer has had speech therapy, and is returning to television in a travel series with Ben Shephard. He has also returned to present The Games and Ninja Warrior UK.

Speaking to Brentford, the club he played for in the 80s, Kamara admitted that he had suicidal thoughts after he left Soccer Saturday as he didn't want to be a “burden to his family”.

“I felt sorry for myself when the condition came along and I didn't know what to do or how to cope with it. You have stupid thoughts. You think you've got Alzheimer's or dementia. I didn't want to be a burden to my family, so you think about taking yourself out of the game.”

But he said that his bleak thoughts have now passed. “How could I ever have thought of not being in this world with my grandkids? I love them and I appreciate life,” he said.

In past years, Kamara said he had not understood mental health and would tell people to just “get up, get on with it and just do it” - but now realises this approach was wrong

“The majority of people who are genuinely honest and have depression, anxiety and have mental health problems need help as best as they possibly can. The start is talking to someone about it. I did that and it’s helped me immensely.”

Apraxia is a neurological condition that affects natural motor functions.

In his book Kammy, serialised by the Mirror, Kamara admitted in his darkest moments that he contemplated suicide as he did not want to become a burden to his wife Anne.

“I'm going to admit something now, something I've never mentioned before,” Kamara wrote. “It's hard for me to talk about, so bear with me. I worried about where I was going to end up. Would my physical and neurological deterioration just keep going and going? And I worried more about the effect it would have on those around me.'

“I'm a man who has always wanted to help, to provide, to love and nurture those around me. And now I could only see myself as a burden. A shell of the man I used to be that they would be left to look after. Seeing myself like that was like staring into an abyss. I could never reconcile that image in my head. It was unthinkable. And it’s at that point I’d think, ‘They’d be better off without me'.”

Kamara became a cult figure in his two-decade football a career. He started at Portsmouth, and also played for Swindon Town, Brentford, Stoke, Luton, Leeds United and Sheffield United.

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