Double tragedy for man, 51, as daughter dies in car crash years after wife took own life
A father has revealed how his wife's suicide ultimately led to his 19-year-old daughter's death years later, as well as his own decade-long battle with alcohol.
Jason Mackenzie, 51, lost his first wife, Cindy Mackenzie, in March 2010. Cindy, a police officer, took her own life at the age of 38 after battling severe mental health issues. Jason believes she thought she was “freeing” her family from suffering.
However, her death deeply impacted their daughter, Chloe, who was just six years old at the time. Struggling to cope with the trauma, Chloe developed severe mental health problems and substance abuse issues, which ultimately led to her tragic death in a head-on collision on February 1, 2023. She was reportedly driving under the influence, and the crash injured four others.
Jason, from London, Ontario, Canada, said: "She was driving stoned and drunk and speeding. I watched my daughter die for five years, and it was horrible, and it was very difficult."
He is convinced that his wife’s suicide set off the chain of events that led to his daughter’s death. He hopes that by sharing his story, others will understand that suicide does not make things easier for those left behind. Since opening up about his experience online, Jason says multiple people have reached out to him, saying his words stopped them from taking their own lives.
Jason, who founded the Aims Institute, shared his thoughts: "I try not to engage in counterfactual thinking - imagining if I could go back and change things. But I am human, and I do it from time to time. Cindy was in inconsolable mental anguish."
Following Cindy’s death, Jason struggled to cope and turned to alcohol as a way to numb his pain. "At the time, I was just a regular guy and didn’t know what grief was. I became an alcoholic for 10 years," he said. "My drinking problem went on for about 10 years - it was a coping mechanism for me when my wife died."
@jason.s.mackenzie Finding out my wife died wa hard enough. Then i had to figure out how to tell the girls. #griefandloss #grief #griefjourney #grievingdad #dad #love ♬ Beautiful Paradise - Aga Alamsyah
He described how his addiction took hold of his life: "I would often go out for beers at lunch, stop for a beer on the way, and then drink at night. Whatever was available, I was not concerned about drinking. It took me trying to quit a million times, and I was disappointed. I was really getting to the point where I hated what I was doing. Great dads don’t disappoint their daughters because they are drunk."
Jason eventually overcame his addiction, but by then, Chloe was heading down a similar path. "She never healed from the trauma of her mother’s death. It was an emotionally driven response to her trauma. It was really in the last year of her life that things became concerning. She lost a lot of weight, she was drinking a lot, she moved out on her own, and there was a lot of erratic behaviour."
Jason recalled how painful it was to watch his daughter suffer. "For a dad to lose a child is the worst thing ever, but the grieving part while watching your daughter in pain is just as hard."
After Chloe’s death, Jason turned to social media to share his grief and help others. In April 2023, he created a TikTok page where he openly discusses loss, and he has since received messages from five people who said his content stopped them from ending their own lives.
"We are constantly surrounded by people just waiting for someone to go first - the conversations I’ve had and the relationships I have built are all about authenticity," Jason said. "Especially for guys, we are typically raised not to show emotion."
Jason is currently writing a book titled Man Down to help men navigate grief. "Grief is a universal human experience, but people don’t know how to discuss it, and I want to change that. My daughter’s death has been horrific, but I want people to know you can navigate this, even though your life won’t be the same."