11 secret rules that Married at First Sight cast members have to follow - from filming hours to public outings

MAFS is one of the best loved reality dating shows around the world; there’s versions in the UK, Australia, United States and New Zealand.

Viewers can’t get enough of watching what happens when hopeful singles put their love lives in to the hands of relationship experts and agree to meet and marry their match within moments - and then instantly move in together and complete weeks of intensive tasks, as well as attend dinner parties with the other couples and weekly commitment ceremonies.

We know that some of the marriages are legally binding and some aren’t, depending on where in the world the experiment is taking place, and we also know that brides and grooms have to sign a contract which involves them agreeing to be portrayed in a way that they may consider “favourable and unfavourable”, among other things.

But, what you might not know is there are also a number of strict rules that all the brides and grooms have to follow. They are:

They can’t use their phones

The MAFS application form asks would be brides and grooms to confirm they can commit up to four months of their life to the experiment, and during that time they have little access to the real world.

All the brides and grooms have their phones confiscated as they head to their hotel rooms ahead of meeting their wedddings - and they don’t get them back until they exit the experiment one way or the other. For the duration of filming, they are each given a production phone which means they can speak to the other participants in the experiment but they can’t have access to their usual social media, for example.

They do seem to be able to contact their friends and family, however, so they’re not totally cut off. This is to help prevent anyone posting any spoilers, but also to help them focus fully on the process and their relationships.

They have to give up their whole lives for the show

Following on from the above, participants have to completely immerse themselves in the show and commit to it 100%. This means that they don’t go to work - but they are paid a salary by the producers so that they can still pay their bills and other everyday expenses.

Many previous contestants have also spoken about giving up time with their children to enter the experiment. MAFS Aus 2019 bride Ning Surasiang expressed her sadness at not even being able to be there for son’s fourth birthday because of being on the show.

Previous cast members have sometimes been allowed to leave the experiment for a short amount of time for different reasons, however. In 2024, MAFS Australia bride Lauren Dunn took a temporary break to undergo surgery when she found blood clots between her shoulder and clavicles. In the same year, MAFS UK bride Holly Ditchfield was allowed to briefly return home to see her children.

Let’s not forget the scandal that came in MAFS Aus 2021 when bride Rebecca Zemek briefly left to return to her home when her family told her that her dog was sick - and it then emerged that she had cheated on her husband while she was away.

They are not allowed to discuss their relationships publicly

We know that MAFS is filmed months in advance, so by the time the show actually airs the fate of the couples is already sealed. To prevent any juicy details being leaked ahead of time, good or bad, however, the participants are forbidden from discussing the current state of their relationships in real time before the show is released or as it is being broadcast.

To help with this, they also give over the social media to producers while the show is airing - something else written into their contract. But, we know that some of the participants break this rule, such as 2025 MAFS Australia bride Jacqui Burfoot who has been posting spoilers to her business Instagram page as the current seasons airs both in Aus and the UK.

They aren’t allowed to wear wedding rings as the show airs

To prevent people being able to tell who is still married and who isn’t, the cast are all told not to wear their wedding rings as the show is being broadcast - even the couples who are still together. The reason for this is simple, it would be a very obvious giveaway for who is still together and who isn’t in real time. If nobody is wearing rings then it’s impossible to tell what’s happened.

They aren’t allowed to go out together in public

With the best will in the world, some spoilers will always end up being revealed ahead of the show being brodcast. This is because, despite these strict rules and contract obligations, as the show is filmed months in advance that means there’s lots of time for situations to arise which reveal the truth.

Once filming is over, the cast return to their normal lives, whether with their spouse or not, and as part of that they will, of course, be out in public - be that going to a restaurant or doing their weekly food shop. This is unavoidable. But, to try and stop any major spoilers being given away too early, the couples who do remain together are banned from going out together.

But, then sometimes the fact cast members are spotted solo, or with someone who isn’t their TV match, leads to speculation about the state of their relationship anyway. Producers can’t really win fully with this one because they can’t stop people going about their usual business once the show is over and neither can they can’t stop fans gossiping.

They aren’t allowed to follow each other on social media

For the same reason as above, the cast aren’t allowed to follow each other on social media until the show has finished. This is because a follow could suggest couples are still together, while a lack of follow could suggest a marriage breakdown.

Aside from the topic of who’s together and who isn’t - which is obviously the main thing everyone wants to know - any social media followings - or not followings as the case may be - could also mean fans can deduce who is friends and who isn’t in the cast, as every year there’s also some dramatic fallings out between the participants outside of their couples.

They have to be available for filming round the clock

The cast members have to be available for filming for long hours every day of the week. Previous cast members have spoken about filming for 12 hours plus per day, and also the show’s legendary weekly dinner parties, which see all the couples meet for a cocktail party and dinner, going on until the early hours of the morning.

Burfoot has also recently confirmed that they were still filming dinner party scenes at 3am, something which has previously been spoken about by 2021 MAFS UK bride Amy Christophers.

They have to ask before they leave the apartments

The couples move in to the same apartment block right after they return from their honeymoon, and once they are there they’re not allowed to leave unless they are given permission.

Couples do speak about going out during the show, usually for a walk or to the gym, but they have to get prior approval before they go out from producers - and they have to take a chaperone with them. This is again presumably to try and ensure nobody leaks any spoilers.

They can be fined if they do leak any information

Speaking of leaks, the cast can be fined a huge amount of money if they do leak any information to the press about what is going on in the experiment. 2023 MAFS UK groom Luke Worley claimed on his social media that they can get fines of up to £10,000 if they are caught giving information to the media.

They can’t talk to each other if the cameras aren’t around

If you’ve ever wondered how the cameras always manage to catch the most dramatic arguments between the cast members, the reason is this: they’re not allowed to hang out together if the cameras aren’t there.

2021 MAFS UK bride Marilyse Corrigan told The Sun: “On an evening, we would go into each other’s rooms, and then one of the producers would find out, come back in and be banging and banging and banging!” She added that producers would tell them to get back to their rooms, making the whole process “feel like boarding school”.

This is to try to ensure that all the dramatic moments are caught on film. But, sometimes things are missed. The cast are entitled to some privacy - after all, a relationship couldn’t truly flourish if the cameras are recording 24/7 and of course there are intimate and personal moments that need to be off-camera. Plus think of how many camera people would need to be employed to follow all of the couples around all the time, especially in the early days of the experiment when there are around 10 couples. . .

So, it’s unrealistic and unfair to think that cameras will be around for absolutely everything - but the producers try to make sure they’re around for the best things by controlling to the best of their ability when cast members are together and when they speak.

2021 MAFS UK groom Adrian Sanderson confirmed that the arguments we see on screen are in fact real. In an Instagram Q&A, he said: "People keep on saying that this is fake drama. It's not fake, they tried to keep it as authentic as possible. That's what they tried to separate us as much as possible and that's why problems happened when we went back to the apartment."

2022 MAFS UK bride Chanita Stephenson also told OK! Magazine: "A lot of people think it's scripted but it definitely isn't. The dinner parties really are that dramatic. Sometimes, they tell you to talk about certain topics but never what to say, it was very real."

They’re asked to have conversations twice to make sure they’re recorded

Following on from the above, ee also know from a TikTok by 2024 MAFS UK bride Sacha Jones that if producers realise they have missed recording something important in a group setting they will ask participants to have their conversation again, for example, so that it can be caught on camera.